10 NSFP (Not Safe For Prudes) Adult Board Games to Play This Weekend
At-home game nights are a ton of fun, but they can lose their appeal if you’re breaking out the same ol’ Scattergories every time. Monopoly is out of the question, of course, because nobody brought enough provisions to make it through the multi-hour faux real estate buying and selling extravaganza. And cards seem downright juvenile if you’re not shitfaced by the end of play. But all is not lost. Upgrade your arsenal with these adult board games — naughty titles designed specifically for adults and guaranteed to expose secrets, generate laughter and make more than a few of your friends blush.
Here are our 10 favorite adult board games, no prudes allowed:
1. Freedom of Speech
Your First Amendment rights are protected (for now) in this politically incorrect game that marries Cards Against Humanity with Catch Phrase. Each team alternates guessing the words on the card (good luck describing “Schlong” without rhyming or “starts with…” clues within the 60-second time limit) until a team reaches 21 correct answers. The biggest potty mouths at the party will win imaginary badges. Price still TBD, freedomofspeechgame.com
2. Loaded Questions Adult
Three hundred-plus suggestively silly questions comprise this guess-who-said-what game of revelry and revelation, perfect for learning more about your long-time partner, your bestie’s darkest secrets or friends you’re just getting to know. Players roll the dice to move about the board, answering questions from three categories: “General sex and adult lifestyle,” “A little more risqué and a little more personal,” and “Questions that could only be answered in your little black book.” The first player to land on the WIN! space and match at least three players’ answers correctly earns bragging rights for their ability to now blackmail everyone at the table. $15, amazon.com
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3. Watch Ya Mouth
Your partner has to guess the NSFW phrase you’re repeating from the card to win points while your lips are spread wide with a plastic mouth guard. There will be slobber — and drool, something you’re used to. $20 + $13 for the NSFW expansion pack, wymgame.com
4. Midnight Taboo
It’s the classic Taboo you know and love with late-night pizzazz. Get your team to guess what adult word or phrase is on your card without using the forbidden clues. Slip up and get buzzed by your opponents. Throw back a couple cocktails and get buzzed all the same. $20, target.com
5. Can of Squirms
Teams of two pair up in this game of awkward questions — like, “Who would punch their mom for $100?” and “Who’s most likely to be aroused right now?” (the game’s makers recommend not partnering with your significant other or a relative, if you know what’s good for you) — leaving the rest of the players to decide if the pair’s answers agree or disagree. Players in the hot seat receive two points for agreeing with one another, while guessers receive one point for the correct verdict. The car ride home should be interesting. $20, canofsquirms.com
6. Dictitious
Wordsmiths can flex their lexicons in this feral game of made-up terms and definitions that results in comical new vocabulary. Players pull cards with faux phrases — like “Purrverse,” for instance — initiating the remaining players to pluck the meaning of the non-word from thin air. Maybe it’s a short song about cats, or a perverted puss, or when someone fantasizes about having sex dressed as a feline. Only your dirty mind can decide. Points are awarded to the player with the weirdest imagination and wackiest explanation. $20, spunkwurks.com
7. Size Matters
Men have been preoccupied with their cock size since the dawn of time, so it’s only fitting that there’s a game where players score points for building the biggest dick. Roll the dice and land on two to start (these are your balls) then shoot for 1s to grow your shaft in the penis-shaped holder. The longer it is, the more points you score — just like real life. $20, spunkwurks.com
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8. Scrawl
Amateur artists have a chance to show off their shady sketching skills in this game of terrible drawings. But there’s a catch: Your doodles, based on a Scenario Card you’ve chosen (like “Playing the drums with bananas,” for example), are subject to interpretation by the player to your left. Once that player has written down their ridiculous guess, the following player then draws that new scenario. The process repeats itself until all the players have participated. The pile then makes it back to the original player to show and tell, and the gut-busting begins. $18, target.com
9. Go BLEEP Yourself
Modeled after Gene Rayburn’s popular TV show Match Game (or Alec Baldwin’s current version, depending on your generation), Go BLEEP Yourself is the 18+ variation of the fill-in-the-blank game show. One player reads a card, such as “I BLEEP in the shower,” requiring everyone to write down a word to replace the missing verb. Players try to match what they think the reader will say (this is where it gets raunchy, and fast) with points awarded for synchronicity. $25, amazon.com
10. Midnight Outburst
Verbal explosions abound in Midnight Outburst, which has teams of players shouting out whatever comes to their nefarious nogs when categories like “10 Slang Terms for Stoned” and “10 Waxing Styles for ‘Down There’” are proposed. It’s Tourette’s meets The Late Show with Sleazy David Letterman. Hit the threshold before the hourglass expires to win. $25, amazon.com
Featured image by Matjaz Slanic